A dream, deferred

After my mom discovered the extent of my anxiety regarding the start of school and my unhappiness about having to go without Elisa, we have come to a decision.

I will not be attending MassBay this semester. I may not be attending next semester. I may take one class this semester, but I'm not sure.

What does this mean?

This means I have no insurance.

This means I will not have the degree in the time frame I had planned for.

This means my life, as I know it, is going to change dramatically, once again.

I will be working full time. I will get benefits, but I'm not sure when they'll kick in. Susan wants to be the assistant District Leader, which means in the next year or so I may "inherit" the current store. After I make enough to cover the cost of a few months' rent and living expenses, I will move to the Iowa City area and start anew. New name. New job. New path.

I will probably attend classes when I get out there, and some day I will have a degree I can do something with.

And even my life has been turned upside-down, I'm not overly unhappy. Disappointed, certainly, but relieved as well. I have no big dreams. I have no overwhelming goal. I want an apartment, a cat, and a job that will allow me to live comfortably - not lavishly, comfortably.

This is what happens to a dream deferred.